Hey, lie down under the lamp
You're pointing at a map
But south, you do not have to go
Wow, your tan is really deep
And salons, they're not cheap
You're very orange and very brown
Bundle up tight, lack of sunlight
Is not enough to stop you
You're looking good
Nobody could ever top you

You're so tanned in
The middle of winter
You're so brown and
There's snow on the ground

Car is sliding off the road
Cuz when it gets this cold
The roads are icy, slippy, see?
You won't make it to the spa
Because your fucking car
Is wrapped around a fucking tree

What to do now?
You need it now, it comes in a bottle
Trans am's no good on icy roads
Yours was the '84 model

You're so tanned in
The middle of winter
You're so brown and
There's snow on the ground

Did you just get back from
Gatineau? or Los Angeles?
What's the difference?

Hey look, an '84 trans am

Teeth are glowing really white
You're 31 and so dried up
Hair as white as driven snow
It's dead and starts to blow
In wind that's fucking freezing cold

You're so tanned in
The middle of winter
You're so brown and
There's snow on the ground